enjoyment

had a normal school day today.
nothing much just all the daily nonsense that goes on in 405.
ponned s-cube with, i predict, the whole class.
and jen, i know who tt person is!
hypocrite!! hahas.

was being childish in the morning doing some stupid hand and finger wiggling thing to entertain myself. cabbed to granny's place after school to get keys. slacked at home and ate my lunch before cabbing to nea2 to be rach's guitarist. really enjoyed myself and i missed them alot. but i still love my cg!

and i still love love love the kuku bigheaded rachel. hahas.

tuition and im alive! (inside joke) stupid guys!

gna sleep early again.
and 3 more days to happiness XD

happy bongday!

lols... actually today is tingfong aka bongbong's birthday!
so we had a realy small and cheap celebration for him after school at KFC.

so, morning rainer treated me to apple aloe vera and i ate my nutella bread and dat emo kid got caught for his hair. FINALLY!!! he got sabo-ed!

school was quite alright lahs. very slack and i started having a headache in english class. probably due to the fact tt i have not eaten or drinken anything since like 715 am. and i lasted all the way until 345.

went to macs to get my ice cream after tt. saw lihong and gang. scared the butts of emily and sharon and i saw diane. went to hub where we met the rainer with the shorter hair. went nebo with rainer and minji to slack and play games and came home!

ahhh...
ciao! hahas.

harry potter and the deathly hallows

i've read the book until chapter 8 only.
but in these 8 chapters, there is romance, humor, deaths, frights, etc.

so i was supposed to study but ended up reading harry potter. hahas.
tuition soon.
may it be a fruitful one.

and to wongyeshen!
please do enjoy yourself in OBS and i will pray for your safety.
and dun miss me too much!
and play badminton with me when u come back.
okay?

hahas.
ciao!

i love northeast <3

alrights.
im back home before 7 on a saturday! hahas.
totally loved service today and girls grads group had 2 converts!
THANK GOD FOR YOU SIEW WEN!!

so anyways, after service, took bus from cuppage down to hougang for the NE event. it was super fun lahs. den played vball with some brothers and got to know mervin's gal friends! hahas. lalalalalas...

northeast rocks lahs! lols.
but God rocks more!

tiredddd.

was really really pissed this morning.
it was definitely too much.
wadever happened to 'ohana' and 'camaraderie'?
i should have just taken teh chance to walk away.
but what is done is done.

was so tired in school today because of the weather but i had no chance to sleep at all =(
rushed home after maths test, bathed and den got my dad to send me to rach's.

home now and just super super tired.

happy birthday cow!

HAPPY SWEET SIXTEEN kowpeishan!

so anyways, i sneezed myself awake. stupid weather has got my sinuses acting up again. so i've got the sniffles, sneezing and an itchy throat. bussed to school and i was so high today for no reason at all.

had FnN and me, rach and linhui only spent 10 mins on our work and the rest of the time bloghopping or sleeping or just stoning. den later on, shuwen came. so actually i fixed up my comp until it was fine and had internet, but the rest had problems with theirs. so i went one round plugging and unplugging alot of things, and by the time i got back to my own comp, i had no internet. so blah blah blah blah blah!

recess!!! our class all the girls sat together as only our class was having recess and we took a picture!!!!

hahas. chem lesson and after tt rushed up to class to have mini celebration for peishan. mrs ang's lesson and my last formal class photo taking in deyi! the sadness... after school hung around and walked around and den left with linhui, huihui, tingfong, bevis and jinleong to collect the cake. den went to KFC to eat. after tt, bussed to j8 to surprise peishan. it was a bit failure cause peishan was facing the escalator and saw us gg down with the cake. but still, we enjoyed.
so bussed back after that, came home and my mommy is home! got a mountain of clothes and shoes. hahas. an den after bathing i slept, woke up for dinner, slept again and now im here but im feeling very tired so probably going to sleep, again. anddd.... sorry rainer about just now. should have put myself in your shoes, but we're still cool yea? hahas.

wells, im off already!!

and just for those who aren't feeling very happy today......

lohlinhui. future student leader. my backside ar!!! hahas.

ciao!

disappointment.

im very disappointed in myself today as i didn't take up the courage to go and evax on my own.
God, 我对不起你了。

i'm sorry.

still up and alive.

i feel so much better after a short break.
i think what really renewed me was when i was sharing about my lower sec days to linhui and huihui on the way back from queensway on sunday. i was really reminded about how much God really changed my life. truthfully, some people made me go through almost hell with the emotional pain they caused me to have in sec one and sec two by the things they said and did to me.

but as i was walking to rachel's house for PM yesterday, i just couldn't but smile. and truthfully, i did not really know why i was smiling but i guess it was the fact that i am so happy to be in this family of God. and yea, after serving for a long time you'll feel so dry and you just wanna give up, especially when you have other major priorities in your life, such as O levels, but the more you wanna give up the more you gotta push yourself to serve.

was really dumb of me to think of giving up.
after prayer meet, had a really nice time with tian and peng and i really love my CG loadds. and we just shared some stuff last night that is really helping me get back on track with Him.

went to school this morning and i was sooooo lethargic. and i did not get any chance to sleep in class. fell asleep during assembly. english course was like great lahs!!!! and im sorry rainer for blowing up and you. walked to central with the big heads, huihui and rainer. bought my chocolate waffle and went to macs to rest awhile b4 gg for tuition. i was sooooo tired. managed to stay awake and absorb though.

alrights, i rly need to go sleep now. or else tomorrow i'll just DIE!

it's a little too late.

i appreciate that YOU care,
but sometimes it's a bit too late.
okays, sometimes it's very late.

and you only seem to care when you are alone with me.
so wad is this, embarrassed to be seen with me?
so wad, when the others are not around den you start talking to me,
and when they are around, you treat me as almost invisible.
yea, u may speak to me, like 1 or 2 lines.
den after that? im just transparent, you can see through me.

i appreciate that you protected me, yes i do.
and you spoke up for me when i wasn't there.
but now you're leaving me in the dirt.
so you tell me, wad am i supposed to do now?
when i need someone to be there for me the most?
and i expected you to be the one to know be better then most.
so.. wad's next?

picture paints a thousand words part 2

tons and tons and tons of overdue pics!!!

so as that kowpeishan says.. HAPPY BELATED RACIAL HARMONY DAY!!!

im not there cause im at home doing FnN! just posted this pics cause i think all my darling friends look so pretty!!! love them all!!!!!

from left to right: linhui, peishan, rachel, lihong, shuwen, huihui, vanessa

at sakae!!!

sec 4 student leaders. ARTS FIESTA!!!

HAMMY!!!!

yesterday's sakae gathering!! we ate from 630 to 10!!

moving RC day!

we totally SPAMMED yeshen's macbook! hahas. spasticness with kriss and rach. guest star soh seepeng! this was so long ago!! before MYEs. at paragon with zionites.


yays!! hahas.

only Him.

this week has been a very draining and emotional week for me.
i just know that i had quite a few breakdowns and i couldn't go service today.

wednesday was alrights.
had english oral and den to NYNY to have catch up session with my CG. and den had to rush home after that.

thursday.
i got nothing to say about it. it was just so.. erghz. i got backstabbed by my own kind and this was not the first time and that got me thinking. in this world there are Christians, and den there are "christians". Christians are those who follow God and love Him by loving others. And yes, they are not perfect, but they repent. And they genuinely love God. Christians are known to be "little Jesus". Aim in life is to grow and become more like Jesus everyday. And then there are the "christians". People who go church and say they love God, but do they love people? They put on a false front and they tarnish the name of God by gossiping and hurting others. i've got nothing to say and i've got no way to retaliate. I mean, the people who you expect to backstab you, they stand by your side. and those who you least expect it from, they go and talk behind your back and all.

had a catch up session with that crazy rach and i felt so good after talking to her seeing that i've had a really tiring week. came home and slept awhile before waking up to CHIONG my coursework. and i skipped school on friday to finish it up and yes!! im relieved!! nthing more to do!!!!!

Friday:
after going to school to hand in my work, i walked back with poh hui hui and we just talked. i love her so!! gna really miss sitting next to her. went for PM and denw ent to meet linhui, rainer, bevis, hengjie and peishan for SAKAE SUSHI!!! and we sat there from 630 to 10. The people were so happy when we were gonna leave. we were sooo full after that. rainer had a very big tummy!!! walked to linhui's place after that and her hamster is HUGE! and cute! then played basketball and slacked awhile before heading home.

im getting really puzzled now.
why can't you take away that facade? it hurts me so when you treat me differently in front of different groups of people.

i spent a good 2 hours reading and praying and worshipping God today as i cudden go for service. i wanna start anew. take away all these burdens and obstacles that are hindering me from loving Him more. i think just being able to meet God gives me a sense of joy.

and, i just wanna thank God for the people around me.

the big fat Os

getitng really drained nowadays.
i dunno how much longer i can hang on.

and people who dun even know the issues im facing at home are saying that other people have worse issues den me. im not getting any room for explaination from anybody. i think my head's really gna explode anytime soon. maybe not only my head, but my temper too. i already shouted and stanley yesterday during my mental breakdown and i feel so bad about it. but ive already apologized.

some people have been treating me like some piece of tissue paper and some have just treated me as invisible. some just don't give a damn.

im so tired of pretending to be strong. you people may think i'm mature, i'm old enough to get through all this on my own. truth is, i do need support. i do need people to stand by me. i just need some care and concern at this point of time. i just need to know that they are there for me. i have feelings too.

and to someone: i have done my part to apologize and i gt nothing back. you treat it as if nothing happened. do u even care that im still so affected by it.

that string that i've been hanging onto, i think that it's just gonna snap anytime soon.

pimples..

i came home early today.
my hamsters called me on my handphone and they said they need someone to do their housework so i came home early.
okays.. basically i had to clean my hamsters' cage and rest before gg for tuition.

anyways.. i totally loved today. except or one part of the day. okays.. i was too 'ji dong'.
but during amaths lesson, me, linhui, tingfong, rainer and kohwei talked about so many things. and we talked and talked and talked andtalked for 2 periods straight. but i did copy my work okays!! hahas.

den chinese, crap with rainer and tuckwai. recess. den had geography and den emaths was another talking session. assembly was fun cause the girls in my class were quite high.
so yea... walked out with linhui and den came home to clean my hamsters' cage. cleaned already den bathed and i slept for about 1 hour 45 minutes. woke up, had my dinner and lunch and den went for tuition. physics class was fun!! hahas. alot of crapping. went to rach's house and now i'm home!!

and.. im gna spend alot of money for the next 2 weeks.
tomorrow having CG at newyork newyork, friday having gathering at suki sushi, next friday having ANOTHER class gathering at marina south steamboat. plus peishan's and rainer's and tingfong's bday presents. hahas.

oh wells, CIAO!

tutu kueh!

sean deserves a kick in his backside!!! hahas.
anyways.. after learning from my sis tt tonight was the last night for pasar malam, i chinged down to get my tutu kueh!!! im so happy!!! hahas.

anyways... had jamming today and it was like.. so fun with deng and marcus being in their own world. but it was fun lahs! lols. hmmms...had KFC after tt den i had a craving for tauhuay with tangyuan so we went to the tauhuay shop. den i left early cause i cudden study and i only ended up kajiao-ing dem, mainly deng lahs and they were ignoring me.

yepps.. so.. tomorrow.. school! hahas. alot of stuff to settle tomorrow!!!
and... listening compre... gna waste like 30 mins of my precious life.

the suckyness of pasar malam food.

me and my sis spent 10 dollars on pasar malam food just now.
$2- 2 cans of sprite
$1- muah chee
$2- 1 box of takoyaki
$5- 2 ramly beef burgers

the sprite was not tasting like sprite
the muah chee not enough peanuts.
the takoyaki was just plain gross.
the ramly burgers the egg was not nice.. all the fillings were dropping out.

ten dollars. gone like that!!! hur!!
linhui's aunty the takoyaki very nice!! hahas.
after i ate it i told her straight away!

so anyways.. some idiot took rainer's wallet.
i like my blog skin XD

move...

hahas. im so cute. no lar.. lols.

i totally LOVED TODAY!!!!!
hahas.
felt so good to be back in nexus..
and to see all my CG members.
had worship at NERC for the last time before moving to the new one.

loved UCTM lahs!!
den the moving began and i tell u ar.. SA guys will be SA guys. hais. lols.
ate and den bussed back with karchian and maybe gg to overnight study with her later.
i'll post pics soon XDD ciao!

rest.

i didn't go to school.
dat stupid wongyeshen called me a ponner.
hur! hahas.

so im quite happy today.
went for PM and caught up with God.
and my shepherd!
and den headed to Ti Amo with my favorite bimbo-seepeng and the crazy kriss. love dem loadds man!!

studied at macs and i cudden really study.
i cant even do basic differentiation.
oh wells, bussed back with seepeng and wongyeshen and now im home and my sister pangsehed me. she wanted to go pasarmalam and den now she dun wanna go. got issues la she. hahas.

stresss.

getting more pimples and im dropping my hair.
too much for me to handle.
some dun give me time to explain myself.

but im holding on tight to God.

thanksgiving.

bliss thanks God for:

• karchian, rachel, chantel, pauline, seepeng, yining, wongyeshen, dengdeng and desmond for helping me to hang on tight to God in her very very down times and for always encouraging her in all aspects of her life esp . studies.
• her best bud rainer chiam ming yang for bearing with her mood swings and letting her rant out to him.
• great teachers that are gonna help her choose her courses for DPA.
• her classmates and friends that never fail to make her day.

gna change blogskin SOON!

breakdown.

yea.. so today was a day full of mood swings and i think rainer gt it the worse. sorry dude!!! but thanks for bearing with me.

talked to rach after CG and i brokedown but it felt so good right after that.
going to apply for DPA now.

*that small brittle string im clinging onto, i wun let it snap. no i wun.

grnius for the wrong reasons.

that's wad rainer says about me.
today was a very jing shan-y day.
kept seeing all my primary school peoples.

when i went to have lunch with carissa, saw weiqiang.
at macs with carissa, saw mdm masni and mrs sim with the jing shan girls softball team.
den chai lin came and i saw xinyun and fini.
den the biggest surprise was when i stepped into the tuition class i saw enhao.
heees.

alrights.. my cookies failed but thank God i got another packet.
back to school tomorrow XD

misses.

i miss these bimbos like dunno wad.. looking forward to CG!!!!

elearning day 1

slack day today man. okaes.. not rly lahs.
woke up den slacked abit and downloaded my e-learning stuff.
went to meet rainer and minji for lunch and a movie.
watch MY WIFE'S A GANGSTER 3!!!
very nice and funny.
but abit sad too..

after tt went to macs to meet hoppies and i studied and i hate organic chem.
so confusing lahs.
was supposed to meet that bimbo SOH SEEPENG but she wussen feeling well.
get well soon QUEEN!!!

studied with deng awhile den went to fairprice and i saw tucky wongweiwei!! hahas.
alrights.. shall go study..

anyways...

WONGYESHEN!!! JIAYOU!!!!

drained but refreshed.

i thinik shalyn is really my Godsent.
ive been so drained, bothy physically and spiritually for the past week because of all the hectic running around and not attending service for 2 weeks. it just sucked lal the energy out of me.

but as i was talking to shalyn on friday, i really refreshed myself by sharing my heart out to her. and i really realised in this past week that i'm living for the audience of One. there's no use trying to please everyone.

i live to please God.

alrights.. off to sleep (again)

arts fiesta.

im really tired now..
just wna say im glad that arts fiesta is over.
but im gna miss doing stuff like this.
and SLs are stepping down soon
was kinda sad lahs..

anyways..
im just gna get some SLEEP!!!
(hopefully i can wake up in ime tomorrow)

one more day!!!

tomorrow's arts fiesta.
and den after that.. i'm free!!! hahas. okaes, not really.. gt alot of overdue assignments.

today was just so hectic.
alot of things happened today but everything's okay now XD
got high with jen during last period.

anyways...
talked to shalyn today and i think talking to her just helped me spiritually refresh myself.
after all the hectic days ive been through for the whole week, ive almost totally lost touch with God.

and shalyn: really enjoyed talking to you today XDD hope your fine now XD

ate with sean, bel, fiona and rainer den me, bel and rainer stayed in macs to finish up the second roll of ribbon. just one more roll to go!! yays!!

alright.. gta go pack my stuff and SLEEP!! yes.. SLEEP!!!

and.. spend time with Him XD

laughs.

today was an okay day for me.
school started out with me, rainer and vkk having a mini meeting with mr joahari and mr tan in the HOD room. aircon.. heees

FnN was slack lahs. hahas.
den we had recess and back to aircon room for chem. learnt organic chem.
english i was trying so hard to keep myself awake.
den VE was soooo funny. i laughed until i cudden laugh anymore.

SL meeting after school.
quite long den after meeting had to wait for mr jo so i slept while rainer and muthu were playing dunno wad game on my dad's laptop. had meeting with mr jo with rainer, muthu and bel and we got chocolates! hahas. went to see mrs chua to finalise everything and den ran some errands in school. headed to macs to do our stuff and home.

got more stuff to do now.
just 2 more days and everyhting will be over~!

family of God.

school was sucha drag with me being in not such a good mood.
and i was quiet today. cause of some reasons. thanks Nurul for being my listening ear.
i was so.. moody today. and i really cudden tahan some things already.
i dun wna be pushed around and be treated like a dog anymore. it's so.... rahs.

but thanks yining for initiating to meet me.
we had quite alot to talk about.
and im feeling less burdened now.
the moment i saw hoppies i felt happy!!!!
and it was very very happy.
it so diff from being in school.

alrights, gta get back to work now. not planning to sleep.

choices.

im eating maggi mee for dinner XD hahas
brought my cookies to school and skandan and muthu and eugene refused to eat!!!
rainer ate 4 and i did not drug the cookies. tucky ate oone and he's stiill perfectly abnormal. hahas.

rainer was irritating today. hahas
didn't pay attention at all in school today. was just tired.
dance-ration is so much more entertaining den deyi start but most of the performers were like.. dancing corpse. i love the SP dance.

had FnN after school and got quite high with rach and linhui. so fun!!!
raba'ah's back in school XDDD

NEA guys are spastic beings.. okaes. mainly NEA2. *ahem deng*
tuition, curry puff, gideon and ruiyong. HOME!!!!!

loser me.

i just baked cookies XDDD hahas.

was supposed to do my coursework but was distracted by my sister's friends.

hahas. they dyed my hair =.=

hmmm...

went to meet rainer for lunch/dinner and den we hung around and i came home and baked cookies. okaes.. i promise to do my coursework after i watch campus superstar XDD heees

just some pics i took on the way to JB.

sick.

my flu is gone!
but there's something still wrong with my stomach.

anyways.. i screwed up my oral on friday. but shall let bygones be bygones.

im so tired now.. gt alot of wrk to finish up...
ciao..