today was a good day for me ------------------ NOT!!!
ahhhhh.. im so moody today and my mood swings are REAL BAD!!

and i was so upset this morning cause of something.
i didn't know what i was doing.
and i broke my chocolate fast.

went to meet Louisa. nice time talking to her.
went to school. found out there was AMATHS remedial and NOBODY informed me,
and i wasted my time going to school cause i cudden get my report book.

bussed to town for lunch.
saw yihui.
ate at pastamania.
bought a bag. walked arnd.

she wentto meet her cousin den i started walking arnd town myself.
and i was still very upset and fed up.
needed someone to talk to.
called my shepherd- no answer.
called yushan- no answer.
called kriss- having band.

ahhh... i was feeling super down.
went to nexus.
danial cheah did something vry dumb.
they're funny ppl la.

BRING IT ON auditions were nice to watch.
rushed to meet my mom afterwards and i got a vry nice nagging and scolding from her. almost wanted toc ry cause i was still vry upset.

cut my hair. shorter and thinner now.
had dinner.
cabbed home.

TO YUSHAN, DESMOND, JOSEPH, WEILUN and MARCUS:
you guys did ok today! dun feel down alrights. what matters most is that you guys did your best! yepps! JIAYOU!!! XD

my gosh!!
im like, fed-up la.
God!!! why is it always like this!!!

sometimes i wonder if X really cares abt me.
or issit just because he/she wants things from me.
im so fed up with him/her already!!

the next person who irritates me, i'll probably just blow up.
im not in a good mood today!
so, just stay away from me.

im so traumatised by all the pimples on my forehead.
oh wells.
reached home at 1140 PM.

went for AJC symphonic band concert.
not bad la.
was with: rachel, deng, keith, cong, zhiwei, debbie, gideon, shaun. peter and alvin were there too.
Before that went to meet rachel and we ate pizza hut.
anyways. i love rachel la. hahas.
after the concert took photos.
yea!

went to mos to eat after that.
felt so full after drinking milk tea.
felt like vommiting. oh wells, home now.

meeting louisa tomorrow morning.
joy :)

alvin, gigi, cong. spastic faces.

us. at victoria concert hall.

i think i fell asleep with the tv on last night. cant remember =X

woke up at 130. with 2 messages.
yay!!! my shepherd is going for the concert tonight!!
more happiness.

not much plans for today la.
tomorrow morning meeting louisa to go school.
den lunching with her.
WE HAVE TO TAKE PHOTOS!

den heading down to cuppage to video bring it on auditions.
NE BAND!! JIAYOU!! XD
den meeting my mom.
oh happiness.

but im still feeling gloomy

my sheep flooded my inbox again! hahas.
but i thank God for her, for being open with me!
yay!! love you Heidi.
and yes, i love carissa too!

thank God for you guys.

im feeling quite gloomy and down today.
as louisa said, welcome to the gloom club!

i think i cried myself dry to God just now, it felt so good. yes, thank You God.

lesson learnt today: we have to bear with one another in love. it's a must.

whee!!! meeting my shepherd for lunch tomorrow XD
happiness =D

i slept at 6 am in the morning. yes, 6 am.
rahhhs. so sleepy now. hahas.

movie later. and i have no mood to study! ahh.
craving for starbucks.

i just had a 'hello' marathon with tuck wai. so stupid. hahas.

this picture has won the SPASTIC PICTURE OF THE MONTH award.

congratulations!

hahas. from left to right: SHIT(pete); TOILET ROLL(mingyu); TOILET BOWL(jian cong); FLUSH(huitian); CLEANER(faith); MANAGER(gideon)

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAS!!!

JianCong Face so SPASTIC!!

God, im sorry.

i have not been living a life pleasing to You.

i'm sorry Lord, i've failed You.

Help me to have a turn-around life, to be more like You.

i want to change. i really really want to change.

Hear my cry.

amen.

just came back from toa payoh.
and kriss came my house today.
and we looked through some pics and friendster stuff.
went to eat crystal jade.
and saw gar meng XD
hahas. home now.
studying tomorrow morning and most probably catching a movie in the afternoon. yepps.

it's really time to take my life seriously.
i cant afford to fool around and be the carefree person i am.

for studies:
im really gonna work hard this term. i wanna see big improvements in all my subjects. im gonna go to school EVERYDAY. yes, everyday. even if im sick. i dun wanna miss out on anything. im going back for chinese tuition. cause chinese IS important. all subjects are. im gonna start studying tomorrow. at least 2 hours a day. i will pay attention in class and i go to school is to study, not to play.

for family:
i will try not to go out everyday of the holidays except if its really important. i wanna be able to spend more time with my sis and bring her closer to God. i wanna be closer to my mom and be able to open up to her more. i dun wanna be afraid of my dad anymore. i wanna be very open to him. i want him to understand how important church is to me.

for music:
im gonna take my piano lessons seriously now. i will attend every week. suspended myself from the band cause i know that im definitely not up to standard yet. i will practice at least one hour everyday. i will get that degree. i'm aiming for that degree. as for guitar, i will practice and practice and practice so that my CG will not lack any guitarist. yes.

for ministry:
suspended myself from the band for ministry too. i need more time for my people. i wanna really spend more time to get to know my 2 sheep more. shall call them up at least 2 times every week to see how they're doing and try to meet them up once every 2 weeks. i also wanna be more available.

and there's more but those are quite personal. im fasting from chocolates and soft drinks so i can really see these changes in my life. yes. with God, all things are possible.

it's raining. no more east coast X(
krisstle is coming my house.
i wanna watch movie tomorrow!!!

RAISE YOUR VOICE IS A VERY VERY VERY NICE MOVIE!!! yes!!
it really inspired me to not give up my passion for music.
music is something i really love alot and it helps me calm down.
i will excel.
i shall get my degree in piano and then use my skills to glorify God. yes. Amen!
anither i learnt from tt movie is to really treasure ur family members cause you never know, one day they may just leave you and you'll be full of regret. i tank God that my relatioship with my sister is very close now, she's more like a friend to me now.

and my brother, i do miss him alot. he's one who understands me and knows me better then anyone else, except God. i want him to come here for the holidays!!! i want him to commit himself back to God.

and to somebody:
today's your day girl!!! dun be moody or upset. go out and have some fun, alrights. it's the day for people to pamper you! yea. with love XD

super great day today!!!!!! i loved sermon alot and worship was great! yes, so great. after service, Gideon met the new NEA and im excited cause we're really gonna grow!!! yes, AMEN!!!

now, yihui is our unit leader!! YAY!! jiancong is taking over grads groups. my grp is merging with the mayflower guys side. yepps, for growth! we will break care grp soon!! hahahas.

FAREWELL! thank God it was a success although beginning was quite laggy la. the first game, the managers had to do forfeit and they did some dumb thing!! hahas. thank God for Jon and Rachel for the games. had to stop because of time constraint but the affirmations were very very good. had photo taking and end!! yes. thank God for everyone who came. ME AND PETE BOUGHT JIANCONG A RED ONION THAT COST $2.10!!!!!! hahahahahas.

left with deng and keith to PS, wanted to watch movie, but no money. bought food from carffeour *i dunno how to spell* met up with clarence and tiffany and walked around and did stupid stuff. bussed back and keith, i hope ur feeling better XD.

thank God for today.
And thank God for my dearest krisstle.
EAST COAST TOMORROW XD

PICTURES!!!

the games and the team pictures.

the transferrings! see cong and his ONION!!!

ZION! a really really great family to be with.
keith squeezed into that kiddy ride!! hahaas
thank God for ZION!!!!! yes!!!

someone is going to be birthday girl in 48 mins XD!! hahas.

i'm hungry =(

i did really really bad for this semester, there will be 4 red marks in my report book.

but what's done is done and there's no use moping over it.
starting next week, i will start studying already.

i will glorify God's name.

No more D7, E8 or F9 next term.

my fingers hurt la!!! and one of them is swollen!! rah..

im not a mornign person la. slept at 3 woke up at 830 and the charger is the wrong one! rahs! hahahahahahahahahs.

anyways, today's the day!! yea. just wanna thank God for yihui, rachel, jonquek, pete, layling, tracie and karchian in advance. hahas, yea!!!!

later, will be fun!!! SPASTIC!!! HAHAHAHAS!!!!!

shit. my finger. ouch. it hurts. stupid door!!! AHHHH!!!

okaes. just here to do some publicity!!!

to all members of ZION!!! (including those transferring)
meet at ISTANA PARK at 4.30 PM tomorrow. yea.
fun and games and even a special item XD

BE THERE!!!!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TUCKY WONG XDDDDDDDDDDDD!!!!!
hahas. ur sweet sixteen!!!

great day today. but i was tired.
morning was wasted la. hahas. and didn't dare to take a nap as i was scared i would oversleep.
went to meet clarence and yushan den went for jamming.

today not very good, but we'll work hard yea.
gonna be busy the next 2 weeks preparing for camp.

after jamming we went to buy bread to eat den took bus to RC for PM. worship was very nice. and thank God for Lay Ling for that something something something. hahahas.

met martin, stephen and desmond at S11 for a drink den walked to the coffee shop for dinner. Peter came along and we talked. hahas. took bus with clarence to ang mo kio and i'm home now. yeps. very very sleepy. and excited for the something something tomorrow.

to YOU: you know who you are. yea.. thank God for God as He is always there for you. when you think you have no one to turn to, turn to God. He's the one who understands you through and through. God loves you and He's just waiting for you to talk to Him. smiles XD

i, as usual, didn't go school. hahas.
my mom took half a day off and it was well spent with her.
went to the market to buy stuff den had breakfast with her.
i love my mommy loadds!

she den left around 2 for class and my day was wasted at home. practiced keyboard, piano, guitar. read the bible, cleaned some stuff off my computer. i cleaned my room!

my dad came home.

this is our conversation
dad: so what did u do today?
me: oh, did as u told me to do. i stayed home.
dad: so what did u do at home?
me: played my music, used the comp.
dad: did u do any housework?
me: i cleaned my hard drive.
dad: i said housework.
me: i cleaned my room.
dad: housework?
me: i cleaned my room.
dad: i said HOUSEWORK!!!
me: *silence* i cleaned my room.

stupid conversation. hahahahahas. it was funny.

i miss my shepherd!!!!! i have not seen her since sunday!!!! X( hahahahahas

as kriss said, i should take the first step.
but what if, things turn out worse?

well, turning to God for answers.

and i'm changing myself, not for the sake of others, but for the sake of God. yes.

school was such a waste of time. rahhh.
shudden have gone.
had this workshop which we had to open up and share our feelings and stuff but i just lied my way through cause i felt uncomfortable la.

louisa's having a fever. TAKE CARE!!!

hall was so cold and the guys wudden let us off the fans, thus, im still sneezing and all.

bleaghs.

didn't go school today. was tired and had rashes all over my arms and neck. i think im allergic to scallops.

hmms.. woke up arnd 1230. went to meet kriss at j8 den we walked arnd den went to meet clarence. walked arnd somemore thinking of what to do. den went to buy movie tix for MI 3. waited for weilun and huaxiang den went to watch the movie. cool movie!!!

huaxiang and weilun left. the 3 of us went to eat at pastamania den went to swensens to eat ice cream. slacked awhile den left for home.

and now, im home. hahahahas.

PICS FROM MY PHONE!!

weilun and marcus. yesterday's jamming. nice pic. me and kriss. today.
me and rachel. second last day of exams.
crazy kukuheaded us.
keith and his orange at sumo house. saturday

GOD!!! WHAT DID I DO TO DESERVE THIS!!! HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAS!!

i was being irritated by 2 irritants just now. they're so irritating la!!!
stupi crazy kukuhead clarence and tucky!!! hahas.

anyways, i think im allergic to something from sumo house. after eating there i will get rashes on my arms and neck. and im having a fever, flu, cough and sore throat. hahas. GOD WILL HEAL ME!!!

im sentimental, just finished reading all my encouragement cards from people. im so touched. yea!!! i got teary eyed but didn't cry. hahas.

i was planning to PON school tomorrow.

but being the ever-so nice person i am, i decided to go to accompany the ever-so nice louisa chen deying! hahas. whee..

we're nice ppl!

YES!!! I PLAY DOTA!!! HAHAHAs.

anyways, 6 more days to restructure.
gonna miss those transferring out alot!! especially the grls in NEA.
mainly zhiyan, pam and faith!

have been in the same unit as them since i converted. from NED with jessie, to NED with gideon with siewluan's grp joining, to ZION.

i will miss zhiyan's zhao xia voice!
i will miss pamela's craziness!
i will miss faith's hyperactiveness, cuteness, crappiness! i will miss having her in the CG.

well, at least we'll still be in the same district!!
WORK HARD GIRLS!!!!!!!!

im still sick. hahas.
nonetheless, still went to meet the band.
desmond told me 1245, he gave me the wrong info and we were supposed to meet at 1145.
at 1153, i was till at home watching powerpuff girls! hahahas.

cabbed down and the cab driver was SUPER NICE!!!
waited for a LOOONG time before the rest came and marcus was high.
went to jam for awhile and weilun complimented that the keyboardist did well today!
YAY!! JOSEPH! WE ROCK! lol.
and clarence, u can sing la.

my shepherd came too!!! XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD
and we're like so deprived, we only have one fan, so far. hahas.
went to eat and talk and crap.
initially, me, clarence, weilun and kriss wanted to go watch movie and kbox but the rest did not have enough money so we didn't.

so went to DOTA. i didn't play cause i had no mood for DOTA.
weilun had no mercy on my shepherd!! BOOO!

oh ya, the walk to the lan shop was fun.
with clarence trying to pull kriss's ponytail and krisstle was like "you very handsome you very handsome!"
and he also said weilun was running arnd like a mad dog. LOL!

the DOTA was nice man. marcus was like on rachel's team. then suddenly he said: RACHEL! THERE'S SOMEONE BEHIND YOU!!!!

then rach panicked and ran away(in the game) and started screaming. then marcus was like : IT'S ME!! crap la. hahas.

left to go nicholas's house then went to golden mile complex to meet the rest of the family.
all in all, i can say tt my days are getting better.

i enjoy playing and watching DOTA, i enjoy crappin and laughing and joking with the rest. i love this family of God. thank You God, thanks for everything.

I LOVE KRISSTLE!!! I LOVE YUSHAN!!! I LOVE RACHEL FONG!!!!!! I LOVE GOD!!!!

happy birthday clarence xD
yea. ur present and card soon! and ur celebration tomorrow!! xD

it's really nice to go and worship God with a burden heart.
my sister got a fever. it went up to 43.7 at arnd 4. we went to the hospital at 5.
i was so worried for her and i was crying and praying for her.
thank God she's better now.

prayer meeting. i prayed and i cried cause i was just so touched by his presence.
anyways, i was feeling sick in the morning cause i woke up at 5 and didn't go back to sleep since then.

service was great. pastor ben preached well.
hmms, went to starhub as usual and im proud to announce that my sheep HEIDI HO topped her level for maths. XDD i love ya gerl!!

i was still feeling very sick and tired and den went to find kriss.
went to play dota. and keith, deng and kriss all went against me!!!

so funny.
my team had 30 deaths and i died 18 times!
headed to PS with kriss, deng, keith, melvin, huaxiang. walked arnd and laughed alot. den me, kriss, deng and keith took 166 to AMK to eat SUMO house. while on the bus, we saw the superband bus with all the superband people inside.

went to SUMO house, laughed, crapped, did stupid stuff. then went to popular and i saw a baby girl who was happily playing with her hands and amusing herself. i waved at her and she almost cried!!! AWW.

anyway, im not the only one who bangs into stuff. keith also! yea! welcome to the club. went to wait for clarence and andre and den deng had this stupid idea that whenever they ask a question, we answer with sengkang. it was funny!!!!!

so headed to macs to eat, then crapped and laughed somemore. so the deyi NCC guys. and now, im home.

busy day tomorrow, jamming, kbox for clarence's birthday and meeting the OICs for farewell BBQ. yepps.

thanks kriss, deng and keith for makig me laugh so much today. yepps! enjoyed myself alot. and andre and clarence for irritatin me, as usual. hehe. you guys rock!

yea.. just got home.
watched finished a VCD-cheaper by the dozen 2, then forced my dad to send me to serangoon to meet yushan as she was sick and dying. i bought honey lemon, strepsils and panadol for her. hahas. get well soon babe!!

you see, both of us are in the same situation. both of our noses are trying to run away from us, yea, so sad right.

left to RC to slack and play guitar and stuffs like that. marcus was teraching clarence how to play guitar. anyways, CLARENCE!!! YOU GOTTA HAVE PATIENCE DUDE!!

prayer meeting was nice. liked it lots. im gonna improve in my guitar skills!!! XDDD

slacked with some sisters like rach, min shian and kriss. then played guitar. my shepherd can sing ok!! hahas.

headed for macs, then the guys came, had dinner.
headed for bradell heights CC to slack and stuff and the me and kriss talked abt some stuff la.. yea..

kriss!!! jiayou babe!! have faith in God.

left to eat ice cream. andre came and was irritating.

now, im home.
tomorrow, someone's bday!! whee.

YES~~!~!~!~!~!~!~

WUHAHAHAHAHAHAS!!! THEY"RE FINALLY OVER!!! EXAMS ARE FINALLY OVER!!

have been mugging almost everyday for the past 3 to 4 weeks just for one week of exams!!! happiness and slackiness reigns again!!!

time to CHIONG DOTA!!! hehehe,

CG. there were cock ups but really Thank God for the core team members who were there. Gideon met us afterwards to evaluate us.

yea, we're gonna improve in those areas he told us about and make a better quality CG.

after CG, went to macs with kar, yihui, deng, keith and cong!!!! yepps. talked abt some things and mr cong, please take care of your health.

im overall in charge for a special event!!! yepps.. NEA-ers, look forward to it!!!! something special is coming up!!

one week only!! hahas. but this event will be a success!!! with God, all things are possible!! yepps.

went to school. talked and crapped with rachel.
my phone's camera is like super clear.

was super tired today. finished my chem test, den went to sleep for 30 mins, then woke up, changed and answer and went back to sleep.

AMATHS was tough. first few questions were ok but after awhile, i didn't know how to do alot. pray tt some of my wrking is right.

CG later!! YAY!!!

new blog address!!!
im moving on, letting go of the past.

im gonna change, for God.